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What is it about men and fire? They are drawn to it like a moth to a flame, or should I say a man to a flame. Camping seems to be the ideal time for these men to show off their ability to build fire, although the results are not always what they expected.
My husband and I were camping on the Fourth of July with several friends of ours. One of these couples has an RV, so everyone gathered at their campsite. We were staying in a locally-owned quarry and the owners were selling raffle tickets to win camping items as prizes. The RV owner’s wife had invited her brother to come out to watch the fireworks. This man who I will call Joe was not saying a word. His sister explained that he had been in a car accident and had his jaw wired shut. So he was just sitting there watching everyone else.
Once the park began giving out prizes, my husband and our best friend both won white gas lanterns and a can of gas to go with them. These two idiots had been drinking for most of the day, so why they thought that this was a good time to try to light their lanterns is beyond me.
First, these two grown men attempted to fill their lanterns by pouring gas from the can into a small hole. Of course, the gas went all over the place. The rest of us quickly backed away from the area. Needless to say, as soon as they hit the lanterns with an open flame, the whole area caught fire. The lamps, the top of the picnic table, and even a little of the grass was burning. Luckily, there was not very much gas, so the flames quickly burned themselves out.
I suddenly heard an unfamiliar voice behind me say “Thank God those idiots don’t have much gas!’ I turned around to see Joe smiling at me. Even the guy who couldn’t talk had felt that the stupidity of the situation needed to be remarked upon.
The women quickly confiscated the lanterns and the gas cans and these were not returned until the end of the weekend. That was enough fireworks for one day.
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